I am sure, like me, you think of yourself as “smarter than average”. You would never fall for a phishing scam or give your bank account number to Nigerian royalty. But the fact is, everyone has their weakness, and someone has found a way to exploit you. Perhaps you’ve been called and told you’ve won a prize and that got you excited. Or maybe you were told about a club discount you could receive, but only by paying huge membership fees. Maybe you’ve fallen for a few of these things. You might still be smarter than average, but even above average people have below average moments.

Mine came in the form of a banner ad. I was told I could buy a Macbook for under $100. I clicked it only because I wanted to know what the scam was this time. The scam was an auction site. I should have clicked ‘back’ right away, but I kept reading. I saw usernames of people who seemed real (and probably are real) winning auctions for big-ticket items like laptops and flat-screen TVs for only a tenth of the retail price.

And that was my weak spot. The idea that this site buys so much stock that they can sell for low prices somehow made sense to the little person inside me who wanted a 50” LCD TV for $150 bucks. The longer I was on the site, the more I felt like I had stumbled upon a gold mine. How did I not know about this place before?

That’s the moment the warning bells should go off. If someone makes you an offer that you can’t wait to tell your friends about, then you are being scammed. As the adage goes, if it seems too good to be true, it is.

I got myself a username and thought it was time to start winning some TV’s and laptops. This was going to be the best Christmas ever. I tried to register a bid, when I was hit by the catch: you had to pay to bid.

Pay to bid? Seemed a little strange. But, hey, each bid was only like 10 cents, so what’s the harm? I’ll pay for a few bids, snipe one of these auctions right before it ends, and I will bringing home some luxury items. So I payed for some bids and began. “Yeah, $60 worth of bids… that’s like 6,000 bids, that’s going to last me a lifetime on this site”.

I started bidding on a Macbook. The bidding started at $0.02. I threw my bid down. Now it was at $0.04 with 20 hours to go. 20 hour until I win my $100 laptop with free shipping!

But why wait 20 hours? Why not go snipe an auction that’s almost ending? There was a TV auction ending in 30 seconds. I entered the room. 3. 2. 1. BID! Yes, I am the high bidder. I WON! Oh wait, the auction has 30 more seconds, how did that happen? Did I read that time wrong? Nope… now the auction has 2 minutes, now 5, now 20. What is going on?

Well, every time you bid, it adds 10 seconds to the auction. In order to win, you need to be the high bidder and stay the high bidder for 10 seconds. But with each auction being watched by 100 other suckers, um, I mean, people of above average intelligence, the auction was never going to end. Once the clock hits 3 seconds, the whole room would bid, pushing the price up another $2 and adding another 10 to 30 minutes to the auction time.

This is going to take forever, I thought, I need to go to bed. The owners of the site had foreseen this problem and created a solution for me. I could buy blocks of bids. I could setup a “bid butler” to bid for me while I dreamed of my new TV. Well, do the math, how long do you think those 6,000 bids I bought lasted? Not very long. Oh, and guess what I won? That’s right, nothing. $60 down the drain.

I started thinking about how much this site was selling these laptops for, in reality. Let’s say the auction ended finally at $200, which for a Macbook would be an amazing deal. 100 people bidding at $0.10 a bid, each time moving the price up only $0.02.

$200 / $0.02 = 10,000 (number of bids)
10,000 bids * $0.10 = $1000 on bidding alone
$1,000 + $200 = $1,200

So, these guys sold that laptop for $200. And out of those 10,000 bids, what are the chances yours will be the winner? Very slim.

Also, $200 as a winning price is a very conservative price. Some were as high as $600, still an outstanding deal. But a $600 final price means the site made $3,600 on that laptop. Sure, a few went for $90, and those are the ones mentioned on the banner ads to get you there. The only way to guarantee a win is to pay 3 times the retail price.

Wow, do I feel stupid. Not only am I down $60, but I was beaten by 6th grade math. Don’t click banner ads.

I was just standing in line at Safeway, picking up an assortment of healthy foods.  Cheesies, cookies, ginger-ale, chocoalte, etc.

As I’m standing in line, a couple comes up behind me and they stand there.  What else can you do, to avoid looking at, or talking to, the person standing a foot away?  Well, you start looking at all the really funny magazines they have there.  The girl looks at them and sees a little book called “Natural remedies”.  She picks it up and says - “Oh, cool - natural remedies!”  The guy openly laughs, and then says:  “What, are you an idiot?”

With considerably more restraint than I could have mustered - she puts the book back and says “Why?  ’cause of the book?  I guess so, then.”   And he responds with “I’ve got a book you should read.”  Which, of course, is ridiculous, since she was just trying to pick up a book about the very subject and read it.

Now, at this point, I really wanted to know - other than that being a ridiculously rude way to talk to someone you’re with - is it the concept of natural remedies that he’s against?  Or is it this particular book?  And why would either of those cause him to think she’s an idiot if she felt like reading the book?

If I wasn’t so immersed in reading about Angelina Jolie’s weight problems, I totally would have said something.  Actually, no - I wish I had the guts to stand up for random strangers, but I really don’t.  So, to compensate for my general cowardice and inability to say anything that might actually matter to the people it applied to, I will just randomly post this on the Intertron.

I find these hilarious. 

Mr. Deity Episode 1: Mr. Deity and the Evil

Manitoba has very horrible roads.  You’d think they could at least get rid of the potholes on the Trans-Canada.  They do tend to keep you awake, though.  It’s hard to fall asleep, fighting whip-lash.  People keep complaining that Saskatchewan is boring.  But it’s only a few hours of driving, and it’s really quite nice - especially at sunset.  The roads are open, straight, and it’s kinda hard to wonder if you’re going the right way.

Calgary Transit should wave all bus fees during the Stampede.  They’d get more people on buses who don’t normally use them - and when people are familiar with the buses and the routes - they’re much more likely to use them.

There are just too many people in TO.  It’s fun there, but it’s a pain in the ass to get around.  Don’t move near a flight path to the airport.  All you hear is airplanes.  All day.  I very much hate that noise.

House centipedes are gross and disgusting.  As Craig pointed out, they make spiders look cute.  They’re a few inches long, their bite is equivalent to a wasp sting, they can climb walls, and they live for years.  If you get them, get a cat.  Cat’s will eat them, you see.  Well, or keep things dry ’cause they apparently can’t live without quite a bit of moisture.

People who are hard to work with … suck.  Finding people that you can work with, that you can communicate with, and who you can be productive with, makes any job awesome.  People who are incompetent and arrogant are … difficult.  It’s even worse when the people who are really hard to work with are actually really nice people.

Cancer sucks.

The plus side to hosting sites on your own servers is that you don’t have to put up with a bunch of bullshit to get things done.  The downside is that it really screws up your online gaming when someone is downloading pictures and sucking up your bandwidth.

I have a beaten up car.  I mean, it rules, and it’s only a few years old, but it has a few flesh wounds.  As I was driving through Northern Ontario, with a huge trailer-full of stuff towing behind me, I was stopped by some cops.  It turns out that one of them was thinking of buying an Impreza and wanted to know how the car was handling the ridiculously steep slopes in the Ontario section of the Trans-Canada.  For the record, the car did awesome.  110km/h from TO to Calgary (3600kms) in 2 days, towing >2000 lbs?  Sweet.  Anyway - definitely one of the best times I’ve been pulled over.

Lastly, I saw District 9 last night.  I had no idea what to expect.  But here’s what it’s about.  It’s about a bunch of aliens being treated poorly by humans.  Some shit goes down, which prompts a wonderful and ridiculously gory battle.  The effects were incredible.  SO much more realistic than muppets.  Maybe you’re asking yourself:  “What are muppets?”  Well, to quote Homer:
“They’re not quite mops, and they’re not quite puppets, but Oh, man!  To answer your question: I don’t know.”

Back to the film.  Be ready for very very graphic violence.  You know, heads exploding, and stuff like that.  Actually, forget that - how about ENTIRE bodies exploding.  Honestly, I haven’t seen gore like that since some crazy video games.  The movie’s shot documentary style, and you’re left with more questions than you had coming in to the movie.  Especially about the movie.  But also about other things.  Like “How the hell can they charge that much for POPCORN”.  And, “If I know (and have known for several YEARS) that they’re ripping me off for this stuff, why do I keep paying for it?”, and of course “How many people have sat in this very seat?”

The movie actually does point out some excellent questions, and the character development was very well done.  Definitely worth seeing.  I’ll give it a solid 3.5/5.  I’m looking forward to a sequel about it.

Well, better late than never!  2008 was a good year in my world.  Musically was no exception - a lot of new artists I hadn’t heard before.  And so, here are the songs I enjoyed the most in a nicely packaged album.  Well, maybe just an ordered list.

• 01 - Frontier Psychiatrist - The Avalanches
• 02 - Closer - Kings of Leon
• 03 - Traffic Light - The Ting Tings
• 04 - Chicken Soup For The Fuck You - Shout Out Out Out Out
• 05 - Ooh yeah - Moby
• 06 - Slew Test 2 - Kid Koala
• 07 - Lost - Walter Meego
• 08 - Song for Clay - Bloc Party
• 09 - I’m So Sick - Flyleaf
• 10 - La Femme Parallel - Thievery Corporation
• 11 - After We Have Left Our Homes - Mute Math
• 12 - Volcano - Beck
• 13 - Water - The Beautiful Girls
• 14 - Club Thing - Yoav
• 15 - California Soul - Marlena Shaw
• 16 - Papillon - Airborne Toxic Event
• 17 - One Love (Edit) - Prodigy
• 18 - Drop Audio - The Qemists

It’s been awhile since our last post.  To get back into the swing of things:

jeff: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1qocbsLkXJY&NR=1
jeff: cats are so ridiculous
jeff: I mean, you add a cat with a funny face to anything and suddenly it’s hysterical
brent: yeah, cats are to funny what fizz is to pop

With my cousin and her 13 year old son, I went and saw “Journey to the Center of the Earth” - the new version with Brendan Fraser.  In 3D.  Yeah, with the glasses and everything.

The story was as expected.  All the plot twists are pretty straight forward.  I’m sure most people could script this one up without too much trouble.  The acting is pretty good - nothing stellar, but not horrible.  Actually, the writing was pretty good - there were lots of good jokes.

What makes this film is the 3D.  It’s awesome.  Everything is 3D, and done superbly.  Simple things, like looking at someone sitting in a room is so much cooler in 3D.  I mean, you really feel the depth in the scene.  There were a number of parts in the film where I tried to dodge out of the way of something flying at me.  That’s just such a different way to watch a movie to me.

Take a scene like in the second Indianna Jones flick.  With the mining carts flying around all over the place over lava pits.  In 3D, that scene is breathtaking.  It’s much more involved when you’re nearly immersed in the scene - looking around the theatre, you see people ducking, screaming and laughing during the scene.  And it’s MUCH safer than actually being there.  The movie is tense because of the 3D - by the end of the movie you’re almost tired from being on the edge of your seat for so long.

Jurassic Park did a good job of showing off a T-Rex in a very scary way.  Try it in 3-D.  It’s insanely freaky.

I highly recommend checking this out.   Grab a few people you feel like laughing with, and go see it.

brent:

“group is a word that really gets stupid the more you say/type/read it”
“groooooooop”